posted Tuesday, March 16, 2010
I was excited to see the road trip because the things we did were amazing. Beyond the drama, I will always remember that trip with Amber and Kendra.
When Natalie came out I was like, "Oh great here we go...." I just knew the drama just walked on the stage. I was just waiting to see what was going to come out of her mouth.
My greatest fear going into the Reunion was seeing myself with Kendra on the TV. But when I finally saw it, I was like screw it! Sh*t happens in life and at this point it is beyond my control. I can't change it now, so why dwell on it? If it wasn't this it would have been something else and maybe that something else would not have made TV but it is my life and I know I have to live with it. I am just so happy to have great, supportive people around me. People make mistakes and some of those mistakes can do wonders to learn and grow from.
I don't think I seem as airy as I was portrayed but all well.... I think being in a new situation just took me back especially since I knew no one. I didn't want to let anyone in. I felt that if I did, things I said would get thrown in my face and I would regret ever letting that person in. I think that certain pieces of my personality were played up. Which is fine because I know I am not a complete airhead and so do people who have actually had a conversation with me. Some people just can't hold a conversation with each other. We were all made different.